How things are progressing…

On Friday, my friend Jeff in San Jose called me on his way home from work. He was stuck in traffic, bored, and wanted to hear about what exciting plans I had for my Friday evening. Jeff, being older and married with two kids and a mortgage, used to often call me to hear about my recent exploits and make fun of my misadventures back when I was still at Stanford. Last Friday, however, I could only report that I would be spending my evening reading a book and maybe watching a movie on my computer.

J: “Wow, that sounds incredibly lame!”

E: “The movie is called The Dictator. It’s supposed to be pretty funny.”

J: “Well at least it’s got a ‘dick’ in it. How come you never do anything fun and exciting anymore??”

E: “I don’t know, I’m just so TIRED all the time!”

Oh. We both knew exactly what I was talking about. It’s the tiredness that comes with working for a soulless corporation. I spend 8 to 10 hours a day intently supervising an LCD screen, I simply have no energy left when I get home. Now, I’m not talking about physical energy, mind you, but creative energy, the motivation to take initiative and produce.

When I first started my industry job, I thought that I would have all sorts of free time. I had just come from academia, where work has no bounds and THERE IS ALWAYS MORE TO DO. In industry, work doesn’t have to follow me home! If I come home at 6, I should have 4 or 5 hours to do awesome things! Warren and I drafted grandiose plans for world domination, and I promised myself that I would make progress on them whenever I had spare time. But the problem is, at the end of each day, all I want to do is numb my mind by watching or reading drivel. I’m supposed to be learning Ruby on Rails right now to build our website, but I haven’t gotten beyond step 1 of the tutorial (install Rails).

The worst part is, procrastination is so easy to justify. Anything can wait until tomorrow, and I always have enough food, shelter, and disposable income to get me there. It really is so easy to fall into a comfortable rut and continuously normalize my expectations to lower and lower energy levels. I don’t have a solution to this one, unfortunately.


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